My journey to polyamory in my married life began like most people who I’ve chatted with about it: my husband and I lost the intimacy and connection we used to have.
Daily life is never all about me. I go without a lot of things on the day to day in order to ensure that my family has what they need most. But there’s a moment, usually at the end of the day, when I want some me time. I want someone to take an interest in me. Let’s talk about the latest news, movie, or art exhibit. Ask about the books I’m reading or tell me you’ve been thinking about my body... Click for pic 📸
Remember the short story I've been working on -- Passion's Curse? Well, I finished my first draft! I really agonized over the ending and finally made a decision and just wrote it, knowing I would change it in the revisions to come. Again, I didn't love how the story was ending, but I committed to the writing and the first draft is done! It feels so good to have a completed draft of my first significant creative writing project.
Even before my husband and I decided to open our marriage, I’ve always enjoyed meeting new people, spending time hearing their stories, and learning from their experiences. I’m definitely an extrovert because I get energy from being in social situations. That said, I also greatly value my alone time. It’s when I can exhale, meditate, read and write. This is precious quiet time that I need daily. In deciding to open our marriage, I was looking forward to spending more time around people I find interesting regardless of their gender. I like spending time with my girlfriends, but I missed male companionship even if platonic. But if there was mutual interest and chemistry, then being poly meant we could ethically explore where that might lead.
I’m a self-proclaimed hopeless romantic. I love romance. For me, however, romance can exist outside of love. I love love, all types of love. And, falling “in love” (not to be confused with loving someone) is the best feeling ever, but that doesn’t happen often for me. Instead, I tend to meet really amazing people who I could easily love, and with whom I can enjoy romantic moments and maybe even sex. But sex is not love and it’s not “in love.”
A few weeks ago, I took the BDSM test and learned that I am 84% submissive. This didn’t surprise me. I’ve always really enjoyed encounters where the men in my life take the lead, but also respect that I have a good brain and solid opinions. That said, it always takes a few challenges to said “men in my life” in order to earn my trust and respect.
Tonight, in my bedroom, it’s very quiet. I lay in my bed alone listening to the still of the night. The lights are off, but the moon shines in through the shutters then onto my bed and the ceiling above.
Do you remember, Sir? That night, you became my Dom and I was terrified to disappoint you.
I'm not sure exactly what I'm writing about today, but I knew I wanted the title of my post to be "foolish mistake." That is what I was recently told I was making by not clearing room in my life to date this guy.
There's such a misperception of polyamory out here. I certainly understand how different it is from what most people are used to, but I feel like I'm always on guard waiting for a misunderstanding. Here’s why.