Well, we made it… Happy New Year beautiful peeps!
Crossing into 2019 reminded me of a commercial I used to see for trading in an older car at a car dealership… they would say you can get x amount of money for any old vehicle that you could “push, pull, or tow in.”
I’m pretty sure I was towed into 2019 because I certainly didn’t enter the new year of my own accord.
On New Year’s Eve, I took my children to a kid-friendly party at the behest of a friend of mine and felt lonely as hell without my husband, who’s traveling this week. Besides missing my hubby, I tried like hell to keep my mind off of the one other person I wanted to be sitting next to. 😢
Feeling the loss of a special friendship like this makes me question why I’m putting myself through this dating thing again. I feel like I’m too old to be so emotional.
I know that I’ll be ok. I understand that uncoupling is a painful process no matter your age.
I also know that I’m being tempted everyday to go back though my relationship and question everything that was said and done… was any of it real?
But I won’t torture myself that way (for long). I know that it was real for me and that just has to be enough. And if it wasn’t real for him, then I had one hell of a fantasy while it lasted.
I did some writing for my book yesterday and I plan to do more today. I’m hoping to finish up the next draft by March, which is very doable if I stay focused… and if school would reopen soon and get these kids!!
I hope your 2019 is off to a kick-ass good start!
Despite the setback for me, I’m determined to make it a good year. Just hang in there with me, I promise my posts will get more upbeat in the next few weeks and if they don’t, you have my permission to turn me over your knee.
Header image by Pixabay on Pexels.
Ass pic by me of me. 😊💋