Dating While Submissive: A Fist Bump for My Inner Princess

A few weeks ago, I took the BDSM test and learned that I am 84% submissive. This didn’t surprise me.

I’ve always really enjoyed encounters where the men in my life take the lead, but also respect that I have a good brain and solid opinions. That said, it always takes a few challenges to said “men in my life” in order to earn my trust and respect.

Most don’t make it that far… And, in fact, there’s only one man who I’ve ever really fully trusted and we certainly have had our ups and downs to get there.

But my husband isn’t a Dom. He may be 60% or less dominant, and that just might be what it takes to make me feel comfortable submitting… to anyone.

Sometimes I think maybe I’m just not a true submissive or maybe my test was flawed. I’m in a FB group where most people think the test is crap!

One thing seems correct, I am definitely a brat, 100% according to my test results.

I can go beyond brat to asshole when I feel like someone is just trying to take advantage of me and I’ll dig my stilettos in deep.

I won’t submit to just anyone or any request or demand. If you don’t like it… can’t deal with it… then go away, we weren’t meant to be in each other’s lives. That’s all.

Recently, a connection I made through a dating app was pushing me for pictures. Of course I sent a few so that he would know who he’s talking to and he sent some to me in return. But the pressure kept up to show more, do more!

He was upset that I couldn’t or wouldn’t download a specific app to chat with him. He suggested that I was making things complicated and told me to keep things simple… I was triggered.

The pressure continued, so I asked him to Buy Me Coffee before I send another picture. I told him, if we lived nearby each other, he would certainly have taken me for coffee by now, right??

You’re going to go through certain formalities before you can expect to make out with a woman or see her privates. This is a part of establishing trust. Am I right?

I know money is a sensitive topic for lots of people. It is for me too. I hate talking about it — even now for this post, but I want to be as transparent as possible. And I think men and women misunderstand each other’s thoughts about money and what it represents.

He got offended that I asked for money and told me to keep my pictures.

*slams door, stomps off*

Although, he said it’s not about the money, what I did in asking for it was unforgivable…

I can live with that.

Oh, maybe he thought I was falling in love after a few days of long-distance texting? Maybe he felt I would do anything he asked because I identify as a submissive, but I fell for that early on in discovery and I now have the experience to deal with it.

I am a hopeless romantic… I look for love everywhere. I think I could fall in love at first sight with the right person and conditions. It hasn’t happened that way before but I have known from a first glance that someone would hold a special place in my heart.

In this case, the coffee was a test… Does he trust me enough to share something he values (money), while at the same time asking for my trust in sharing something I value (privacy… and, ummm, my body!!)?

It’s $3!! And somehow that offended him, but I shouldn’t be offended at the request to see my vagina after only a few days of texting?

No sir!!

Let me be clear— I’m not selling pussy pics, please don’t get me wrong, but I’ve learned that if a man is truly interested, he won’t mind sharing two things with you: time and money.

It doesn’t have to be a lot of either but proportional to his interest, means, and availability.

I’m really comfortable walking away, and the earlier we suss the situation, the better.

During this moment of BDSM curiosity for me (that’s what I’m calling it now 😊), I’ve discovered what a princess I am. Ha! And just in time for the royal wedding this weekend.

Princess wasn’t an option on my test, but it makes total sense.

If you want me to treat you like my King or my Daddy, which I LOVE to do, then be prepared to treat me like your princess or baby girl. 👑

Anything else and all you’ll get is the brat!

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Image by Pixabay

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